Step-by-Step Instructions To Make You Look Like a Pro
First thing you need to
do is decide if the shower is going to be a surprise. If it is not, (which is
becoming the norm due to peoples' schedules) give the bride-to-be and
mother-to-be a call.
If it IS going to be a surprise, give that person's mother a
call. From their mother, get their husband or fiancée's number. You'll need to
contact both people to get a full list of people who you'll need to invite.
A sometimes overlooked step is to get the phone number of
their best friend at work (either the spouse or mom should know). There may be
close work friends that are missed with the invitations if this step is
forgotten.
Questions you'll need to ask both women (mother and bride or
mother-to-be):
Who would you like to come? You may be surprised. They may
wish to have a Jack and Jill (a couples' shower) or they may respectfully ask
that it be kept small, to a few close friends. Make sure you get their names
(spelled correctly), full address AND phone number. You never know who's going
to forget to RSVP. You may have to make a couple of calls the week of the shower
to finalize the headcount.
It's good to find out in advance if there's anything
specific they'd like. They may have seen a certain party favor that they've
always wanted, or a cake made by a certain person. Maybe they've always dreamed
that their shower would be outside, or formal, or... who knows. They've had at
least 20 years to think of this moment. They've probably formulated some ideas
for themselves.
When would you like the shower? This applies both to the
month of the shower, and to the time of day. Find something that works with both
of your schedules, and at LEAST one month in advance. Lunchtime showers are the
most traditional, while breakfast showers are becoming more and more popular.
Where are you registered? Everyone who will be RSVPing will
ask you this. You might as well find out ahead of time. It's up to you if you
choose to write it in the invitation or not.
After going over this with the guest of honor, you should
discuss where the party will take place. If it's a small gathering of a few
friends, you may just wish to have it at your house. If it's 20 or more people,
you should ask for suggestions of her favorite restaurants. Call and speak with
a manager to see if they'll accommodate your party, and how many people you plan
on having, for the date that you've agreed on. If yes, then great! Move on to
the next step after making your reservation. If no, ask if other Saturdays or
Sundays are open in that month. Then call another restaurant on her list. If you
hit another dead end, you may be calling too close to the actual date of the
shower. Call the guest of honor back with options. Would you rather take your
second or third choice restaurant, or would you rather switch the date?
Ok, so the names and the place is settled. Head on out and
get some invitations. Whatever the headcount is, it's a good rule of thumb to
buy 10 more. Even if you have to pick up an extra package. There WILL BE LASTS
MINUTE ADDITIONS. It's almost guaranteed. If the shower will be out of town,
make sure that you send a map with the invitation. Many restaurants have
pre-made maps to their location from major highways. Ask them to mail it to you.
You can make copies and include them in the invites.
Make sure that you give an RSVP due date on the invitation,
and not just your number. Possibly even your email address. Wait one day after
the RSVP date and start calling people who haven't responded. If you'd like to
save yourself some trouble, call the guest of honor first. Most of these people
are close friends of theirs and probably have mentioned to them if they're
coming, regardless of sending back the RSVP. This could cut your calling list in
half. Of course, if it's a surprise, ask the mother of the guest of honor.
Now that you've finished calling, you've got a final
headcount. Call the manager back at the restaurant and give them the final
count. Ask for a lunch menu to be faxed over to you to go over options and
prices. They may also have special prices for parties of 20 or more guests.
There are lots of options here, and many restaurants do it differently.
Sometimes you have to have the number of "chickens and beef and vegetarian"
ahead of time. If that's the case, make sure to request that information in the
RSVP so people mention their preference to you on the phone. Sometimes you can
wait until the group is assembled at the restaurant before they take the order.
Or if you're going buffet style, you have nothing to worry about. Clarify with
the manager while you're on the phone.
Call your favorite bakery to order your cake. Make sure you
tell them your headcount so they can better tell you what size you'll need. Give
them the message you wish to have written on the cake and have them read it (and
spell it!!) back to you, along with the date and time you'll need it to be
ready.
At this point, you should give a check-in call to the guest
of honor and let her know where everything stands, and clear up the last minute
invites and any other questions you might have. Go over the list of people and
ask if they'll be making a seating chart.
The hard part is over! Now it's just the fun stuff! Like
Games, Prizes, Decorations and Party Favors!
Games can range from tame to out of control. It will really
depend on the setting of the shower, and who's coming! If you have a large 50
and older group, or if it's held at a public place, some nice, sedentary games
might be appropriate. Look for games like Shower Bingo, or make your own Word
Search. Or, guess what kind of baby food it is, after taking off the labels.
Of course, there's the more fun games that are better suited
for the in-home setting, like create your own wedding dress out of toilet paper
in 2 minutes game. This type is great, but might get out of hand for a
restaurant setting.
For a complete list of games, including the ones mentioned
above, click here! You can't have games without having prizes. A general rule of
thumb is to pick 2-3 games, (depending on how long you'd like the shower to
last), and pick enough prizes to have first, second and third place for each
game. Suggestions for prizes? We've got lots! Check out our own Showergames.com
prize page, and also the prize idea page!
Now, decorating!
Lots of ideas here. Keep it simple. Just the typical
streamers, balloons and centerpiece should do the trick. A vase of flowers, or
even just the cake are beautiful centerpieces. If you're going to a restaurant,
you won't even need all of that! However, you should bring something to let
others know which table you're at. Or, if you have a private room, a small sign
should be made and given to the manager to put at the front of the restaurant,
telling guests that your party is downstairs, or in the back, as the case may
be.
Did the guest of honor opt to use a seating chart? If so,
you can print the names out on your computer and make small tent-cards from the
list. Or you can purchase small frames to place their names in and put it by
their place setting. This is a very elegant look. The best value we've found
online to purchase these is at weddingframes.com.
Make sure you ask the manager for the layout you will be
using. Circle tables or rectangle? How many people to a table, and how many
tables? Request a fax of the schematic sent to you if they have one. Pass this
on to the guest of honor to begin the task, and gather it from them before the
shower.
Party favors are a great way to have something for each
person, regardless if they win a game or not. It's a wonderful reminder of the
day they spent celebrating with you. Check out our favors page for a wide range
of favors for every price range.
Another great thought on helping the guest of honor: bring a
notepad to the shower. When opening gifts, have them announce who each one is
from and what the gift is being opened. Write them down carefully in the
notebook. This is a gift in itself! The next day they'll never remember who gave
them what, or they'll have lost the card that went with the gift. This is the
next best thing to writing the thank-you's for her!
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